June 7

I've made progress today, both personal and professional. As I awoke in my usual ball of hyperventilating stress, I grabbed a book to read while the shower water was heating. It was A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. I opened the book to somewhere, anywhere. I read a passage that says that my thoughts are creating my misery, not the circumstances themselves. This stuck with me, and I repeated it under my breath throughout the day. It actually helped! People were looking at me strangely because I was mumbling to myself by the fax machine, but who cares.

And, I truly believe, because of this mental detachment from the suckiness of my situation, it allowed more positive energy into my life. I got a job lead from my previous boss! Well pull my chain and call me Yankee! I'm so excited! I really think this could turn into something positive. Even if it's not my dream job, I believe it could provide me the mental space I need to discover some things about myself.

So fingers are crossed, toes are crossed, eyes are crossed, prayers and incantations have been said, chickens have been sacrificed.....oh wait.

Well, I had chicken tacos for dinner, so maybe that counts. There's probably some voodoo value to sour cream and guacamole.